Some half-formed thoughts on RuPaul’s Drag Race ep4: Spoof!

So, that episode, eh? I genuinely don’t understand a single thing about Spoof!. The winner, the bottom two, the editing, the evictee, nothing. NOTHING. I’m assuming it was some not-very meta reference to the episode title.

I don’t get why Kennedy Davenport was the winner. She was pretty…OK? Forgettable. I can’t remember what she wore. I can’t remember what she did in the challenge. She didn’t seem to be a driving force behind her team (probs for the best after last week’s shitshow).

JDF or Katya stole the show for me. Probably because I’m in love with anything to do with Bianca, and I’m rapidly becoming a Katya ‘stan’ (is that a thing? I don’t really know what it means so god knows what I’ve just confessed to).

Also: Max. Courtney Act’s performance was mental in the Sissy That Walk vid, and lovely Max made her so deranged it made sense. She put in more effort than Violet, who merely stomped and let her mouth hang open. I do that every time I wait at the self-service tills in Sainsbury’s. That doesn’t make me America’s Next Drag Second Place Superstar.

Bottom two? Kandy Ho should’ve been there for sure. Who else forgot that Kandy Ho even existed till her boring runway? Sorry dear, but you’re a filler queen. (Feel free to remind me of this statement when she is crowned the winner to end all winners or something).

I love Pearl – I’ve gone from her’s being my least favourite MTQ video to watching gifs of her walking into trees on a loop. And laughing with glee each time. However, I didn’t get her lipsynch. The intensity in her face was there, but her arms were like Peter Kay doing an impression of a kid at a wedding.

And Trixie? She’s so interesting, I don’t know if I loved-loved-LOVED her, but I was fascinated by her and desperate to see more of her schtick. (I was supposed to see her live last week but had to stay home as Liam was returning from a week away in Chicago and I figured I should spend some time with him, not that I’m bitter or anything). However, that dress did not fit her properly. At all. Her face was beat to bollocks, but from the neck down she looked kind of… rushed?

Trixie Mattel, 20% off for this week only!

There’s been a whole drama about spoilers this week, which I kind of get but then when you are too scared to mention the girl who left on Wednesday morning things are going a little bit far. But I’m not going to let those weird Drag Race fangirls (not me, obviously) scare me any more. Hold on to your hats because TRIXIE LEFT, GUYS. (#justiceforTrixie)

But listen, chaps. Don’t worry. I’ve come up with a plan to help you deal with your emotions. I know what its like. Only last year I watched Bianca’s crowning whilst sobbing with hysterical glee into my runny scrambled egg, surrounded by cat hair, wearing a ratty old dressing gown.

For the remainder of the series, if one of the queens in my library (at the moment that’s Katya, Ginger, Max, and Trixie with more to come) wins a challenge you can get her for 20% off full price for that week. You can shove her on your wall, get out the party poppers and fun toot horns and dance around her with glee.

And if your fave is mercilessly chucked out (I’m thinking more of a Trixie-event than Jasmine) you can get 20% off her for that week. This will mean that you can pin her to your telly and pretend she’s still in the running. Because, as we learned from BenDeLaCreme last year, being made to take an early sashay is a right bitch.

Have a look at all of my queens from Seasons 4-7 here.

Agnes’ RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 7 brain spew

Its that time of year again!  The couple of months when I hardly speak to my husband because I’m too busy reading every thread on the Drag Race subreddit, when I alienate a whole bunch of Twitter followers by wittering on about fish, and when I schedule my day around watching RuPaul’s Drag Race, Untucked, Whatcha Packin, Beatdown, Alyssa’s Secret, next week’s previews and every other video on YouTube (hello there, Rugrets and Ruflections!).

And its the time when I start banging on about new stock in my Etsy store.

I’ve watched every season of Drag Race (sometimes feeling like the only person who did) but Season 6 was the one where I started to get a bit, um, obsessed. I fell in love with Bianca, so went to see her in London. And then I saw Adore. And Sharon Needles. And then every Drag Race alum I could get my claws into. Imaginary claws; I never spoke to any. That would be terrifying madness.

And when I wasn’t watching drag queens on telly or the stage, I was drawing them. And through doing that I’ve met so many lovely fans from around the world. They send me photos of my prints in their houses and suggestions for who to do next (Sharon, mostly. But I’ve also had a request for Dida Ritz. I’m guessing that came from Miss Cheesecake herself).

I’m pretty firm on my top queens of all time- Bianca, Jinkx, Alaska, Raven and Sharon. It’ll be interesting to see if any Season 7 contestants can muscle their way in there. At the moment Katya looks most likely, but good golly Pearl is pushing through. That whole deadpan-walking-into-scenery thing has stolen my heart. Ginger is getting a pretty good (and deserved) finalist edit, and Max has Miss Congeniality stamped all over her – unless she stabs Trixie in the eye or something, she’s a shoo-in.

Having re-watched Seasons 5 and 6 recently (like I said, obsessed) I was surprised by just how rubbish Milk was having loved her so much at first. She’s whingey, clueless and one level above Phoenix in terms of interest. Max will get a lot of comparisons with her on account of being tall, think, kooky and having a name that begins with M, but Max has an aesthetic that makes sense. Its well-rounded and part of her character. Also, a job as a motivational speaker is hers if the drag thing goes out the window.

And another thing – Ivy Winters as Miss Congeniality? That title is all about having heart, providing inspiration for the other contestants, being funny and honest and true to yourself. All Ivy Winters did was walk on stilts. I could do that! (I couldn’t) Its taken me nearly two years to realise this, but Alyssa Edwards was robbed. She deserved it for her RuPaul’s Roast alone. (I also saw her in person recently and that girl has charm leaking out of every hole).

SO ANYWAY. I’ve started stocking my shop with new Drag Race prints. There are the old favourites, but I’ve now introduced Ginger, Max and Trixie. Hopefully Pearl and Katya will be on their way soon (I’m thinking that they have more amazing runway looks coming our way, so am holding out for an iconic outfit I can shove them in).

They are £15 plus p&p, printed in the UK, and on quite lovely silky paper. If one of my queens has won the challenge, for that week they will have 20% off full price (so at the moment Max is £13).

I’m always up for requests on who to do next, so please shove your suggestions into the comments!